A shocking article on the front page of today’s New York Times reveals that Gay Couples Find Marriage Is a Mixed Bag. You have GOT to be friggin’ KIDDING ME! Those blabbermouths at the Times! Okay, you caught us. We in the heterosexual community have conspired to keep this small but important detail regarding marriage from gay couples. Guess what? Marriage is a shitload of work. Here’s my favorite quote from the article by Jacob Venter, a 44-year-old child psychiatrist who recently married:
“Nothing turns out the way you imagine…”
Dear Gay Community: Please refrain from revealing your charming, innocent, cluelessness all over the front page of my Sunday paper. You caused me to do a spit-take with my coffee.