The Tormented Artiste

I don’t really want to be famous, and I’m kind of scared that might be happening.

This piece of drivel is from a fluff article on Michael Cera in the New York Times. Master Cera is the young actor who played the accidental father in Juno and was also in Superbad. He’s concerned about being too famous. He wants to be just a little bit famous, but not a lot famous. A while back, I read an interview with Nora Jones and in it, she said that the release of her first album was the beginning of one of the most unpleasant periods of her life because the album was a huge success and, “I was everywhere.”

Listen here, you fucking nitwits: If you don’t want to be famous then, for Christ’s sake, don’t pursue a career in the performing arts. Are you KIDDING me?! Do you have any idea what a rare gift you’ve been given? Of course you don’t. You’re too young to realize it. At the very least, you need to keep those sentiments private and not soil yourself in the New York Times. Your job is to promote your new work. Keep you pie-hole closed about the horrors of success. Kurt Cobain’s daughter is fatherless because he didn’t like being famous. Boo hoo hoo. Poor Kurt. If you don’t want to be famous, then don’t choose a career whose success is measured in the size of an audience.

A special note to the delicate Mr. Cera: Don’t stress about being too famous. You’re too shitty an actor for that to happen. You play the same guy in every film. You can get away with that stuff if you’re Al Pacino or Jack Nicholson but until then, you’d better concentrate on showing some depth, junior. For now, you’re just a wart on the ass of Hollywood.

You’ll have to excuse me, but I gotta run. I need to start my 2-hour commute home.

Grrrrr. Arf! Arf!

10 thoughts on “The Tormented Artiste

  1. Hmmm, not that I ever need to worry about it but one thing that brings me up sort every so often is the idea that my writing might attract fame. Money. Cool. I would love to turn my passion into money, but fame? I can understand the idea that it’s about the doing/performing and not about fame (although some “artists” clearly love the fame to the point of a deep-seated obsession with it).And it is whiny when they go on and on about it after the fact (though some need not worry because it won’t last long), but beforehand a person has to wonder how it will change things/them.

  2. It is a conundrum, isn’t it?On the one hand, you have the bizarre American obsession with celebrity.On the other hand, you have performing arts types whose very talent is often rooted in insecurities and other character flaws, characteristics which often lead them to make questionable life choices and more often than not, spectacular meltdowns.Personally, I think I would have liked the traveling minstrel days when artists would trade song for supper instead of a mansion in Malibu.

  3. can’t have it both ways…Carole King was deathly afraid of being in public, i think. She managed her “gift”, shared her talent, but avoided performing… other than in studios.Funny thing? Saw that she’s doing a rare tour somewhere nearby… maybe she needed the cash. Bad mortgage, maybe…and that overcame her stage fright?

  4. Everyone is entitled to their opinion, whether they are a celebrity or not, but the gibberish these idiots spout.Just entertain me; it shouldn’t be that much to ask for. After all it’s the career choice you consciously made.

  5. *claps enthusiastically* i know plenty of people who are playing in bands with no desire to be famous…they do it for the love of making music. If you go into a career in any of the performing arts and make it, you will be famous, just get over it!

  6. I once heard Mischa Barton say in an interview that she doesn’t like having opinions because she gets judged by them. Dumbass. Also … 2 hr commute? Are you serious?

  7. being famous means that thousands of people you wouldn’t give the time of day to will think that they ‘know’ you and have the right to interact with you in the public sphere. I can’t think of a worse way to conduct one’s life really.I respect those who don’t give interviews and let their work speak for itself

  8. annie: It’s a devil’s bargain, that’s for sure. If you want to make a living off of your writing, then you’re going to need some fame. Get ready.rob: That’s a excellent point. Great talent is often fed by great insecurities. It’s not exactly the best emotional state to deal with fame.daisy: You can pull a Carol King or a Greta Garbo and disappear. But if you choose to stay in the limelight, you shouldn’t complain about it. Bruce Springsteen seems to manage his fame quite well.digital: Agreed. You can have an opinion, but on a public stage, you need to conduct a bit of self-censorship. I censor what I say every day at work. It’s necessary.sid: A 2-hour commute ONE WAY! I spend close to four hours a day commuting. I get a lot of soul searching done. ifmusic: Do it for the joy, but be prepared for the consequences.nurse: Exactly so! Cormac McCathy refuses to sit for an interview but his books sell just fine.

  9. Couldn’t agree more. What a load of rubbish; you might be interested in these excerpts from the weekly gossip email I get popbitch:”Another celebrity with an odd concept of privacy is Steven Gerrard. When we suggested Steven was looking at a new house in Lancashire, his lawyers were very quick to claim Gerrard’s privacy was being invaded. So it’s surprising to see Steven this week on the front cover of OK! invading his own privacy with a family photo-shoot at his “exclusive Portuguese holiday hideaway”. As he recently told footballers’ style-bible Icon, “When I want to get away from football with my family and there are people following us with cameras. I feel I deserve my own time with my family too… it annoys me when people don’t respect my family’s privacy.” made me giggle anyway!

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